Tuesday, February 7, 2012

This too shall pass.

I'm Hannah. My mom calls me a "medical mystery," Kyle calls me a "medical nightmare." Take your pick. 

My Medical Charts - long story short:

  • When I was a wee little one, I decided to relax and have a nice chug of antifreeze. I don't know the levels or how they determine this, all I know is if you're at a 12 or 13 then you're really, really sick and need very close monitoring. I was at a 17.

  •  All throughout my middle school years and into part of high school, I had horrible migraines. It got to the point where I could barely function and they would attack at random times, and it was unbearable. I specifically remember laughing at a joke with my mom and out of nowhere I felt the worst pain in my head and was crying and in a fetal position in seconds. I went through a gagillion tests and was diagnosed with Cluster Migraines. They are also known as the "Suicide Headache" because they get so unbearable people end it. The thing about clusters is each migraine is worse than the last one. Luckily, the frequency has slowed down drastically for me.

  • When I was in high school, I was sitting in Spanish class and started to have a typical ear ache. I called my mom and said I think I need to go into the doctor.I went in, got my meds, went home and went to sleep. No biggie. The next morning I woke up with an oozing, bloody and VERY swollen ear. It was so swollen that it folded over, and within a couple hours I couldn't open my mouth and the whole left side of my face/head was distorted. I went to the ER and within seconds I was admitted to the hospital and getting antibiotics through my IV and had a tube connected to my ear that constantly drained. Gross, I know. Turns out the infection grew rapidly down into my jaw and was attempting to travel to my brain. That, BY FAR, was the most painful thing that has ever happened to me. I lost 17 pounds in 3 days though :)

  • When I was 38 weeks pregnant I went for a nice stroll outside to try to work my stubborn daughter down a bit. I was out for a couple hours, and was even in shaded areas for a lot of the walk. Later that evening I got home and realized I was sunburned. I could tell I did a good number on my shoulders but lets just face it, no sunburn is ever pleasant. The next morning I woke up to a 1-inch yellow blister staring me down. My chest and shoulders were full of tiny blisters and there were 4 that were so large I had to go into the ER to get them removed. I won't go into detail about how disgusting and painful the procedure is but take it from me, it's not pretty. I had 2nd degree burns and if you see my shoulders, I really do look like I'm a burn victim to this day. 

You get it. The difference between me and a hypochondriac is I have witnesses to testify that they have heard the doctors say "huh.." or "well, this isn't typical.." My mom and I have learned to laugh about it and just accept the fact that something absolutely mind boggling will happen to me one way or the other. Just like we say, it wouldn't of been surprising if the triage nurses would have asked how my test last week was. Kyle on the other hand is terrified. He thinks were going to go bankrupt trying to cover all the medical expenses. Judging my track record I can't really blame him. Every time I have an ache or a pain he looks at me like I'm about to fall apart right before his eyes. The latest thing I'm going through is trying to pass these dang kidney stones. I've had horrible pains for weeks, so I think it's passing time. I went in yesterday for what I thought was a simple infection, but no.. can't be as easy as that. Surprise surprise.