Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Most species do their own evolving - just not Mothers.

I have disproved the efficiency of evolution because mothers haven't developed energy packs, nor have we grown 6 arms. Due to recent research, I would also like to add that evolution is a crock because we still have average immune systems.

Picture this: Your typical one-year-old is running around the house destroying everything in her path. The food cabinets are wide open, crackers are smooshed into every fiber of the carpet, the clothes that took you an hour to fold are hidden throughout the house and you see the baby trying to climb the entertainment center. You just stare at her hoping she will get the hint but, true to one-year-old-fashion, this means war. Now it's a game and she is in the lead because mommy feels like her head is going to explode.

This was us last night. I have been battling a horrific cold and I don't have one ounce of energy left. When we have our own boogers to wipe it's like a sensor goes off with our kids and they know they can get away with anything. So when Brinley gave me the "bring it" look and tried climbing, I let her go at first. Deep down my head was throbbing from just thinking about standing up, but I justified my laziness as a "learn for yourself" lesson. There weren't any sharp corners for her to catch on and the clothes that were once folded would provide a cushy landing. Wouldn't you know, she clears the first step and wants to keep going. There's a fine line between tough love and neglect - and we were about to cross it. So I roll over and try to get up. You know where your head is so congested you feel like you can hear every blood cell traveling around? Then the sudden change in elevation opens the floodgates of your nose but you're still too dizzy to grab a tissue, so the sleeve it is.

This is the not-so-pretty side of motherhood that no one warns you about. Its that moment when no one will be there to baby you - because there's a new baby in town. Its that time when all you want to do is curl into a ball and fall apart, but you have to pull it together because you are that superhero who needs to save the day.

Slowly but surely I make my way over to Brinley to get her down. At first she looked relieved that her superhero was coming, but as I got closer the realization that she was being naughty hit her and she (somehow successfully) climbed down and ran away. I put all my dang effort into getting to her and she just ran off. I wanted to cry.

A lot of my mommy friends are dealing with this situation too, and they all have asked the inevitable "why are mothers allowed to get sick" questions. Rest assured, we are not alone, but I have a better question to throw out there..

Why the hell doesn't this happen to Dad?!